Thursday, November 30, 2006
No I'm not saying I haven't done that before, but that when I was so immature, young and stupid. As I get older, media and authorities start to stricten laws and increasing my knowledge about what's so bad about driving while being drunnk, so I stop--completely. If I have been drinking, I will make sure I don't drive. If I know I have to drive, but wanna drink anyway, I will give it at least an hour and a half to sober up before putting myself behind the wheel. Or I will drink light and give myself time to sober up anyway. Worst case, if I wanna get wasted, I will drink at home. But some people don't have that mentality, they just plain drunk and don't care. So many news out there about this stuff, so many examples why they shouldn't do it, but oh well...that doesn't stop people at all. Personally, I believe these reasons should be enough for you to act like a responsible adult:
Reasons not to drink and drive:
1) Will kill yourself
2) Will kill others.
If above isn't enough to convince your stupidities, below are some more:
1) Your dead body after match will definitely look like pieces of leftover meats at a slaughter house.
2) Your dead body will be seperated in pieces and that your arms and legs might not be found.
3) You will cause your mom and dad to cry once they realize how stupid you turn out to be.
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Ten days ago, I woke up with moderate ear pressure. You know that same feeling of ear fullness just like when you sit in the airplane. In that case, you would chew up Mentos or something chewy to reduce the pressure. But in my case, I can chew the whole Mentos factory and it still doesn't do a damn thing. RN suggested me to use Nasel Spray and take decongentant daily, in case it is caused by my sinus and allergy. She definitely didn't wanna see me.
Today, 10 days later, I realize I can't stand this crap anymore. After talking to the hell nurse, I was recommended to go see a family doctor to check for ear infection. A few hours and two magazines later, I was told I have middle ear infection caused by sinus. According to the MD, virus in my sinus travels to my operated ear causing it to be infected. Great! "so am I gonna have this infection forever since I will be having sinus infection for the rest of my life?" I asked the doctor. I hate this damn sinus crap. It's ruined half of my life already!!! I can't be having this ear infection on and off just because your sinus virus decides to take a holiday trip to my ear!!!!!
So now, I'm stuck with some more antibiotic meds, decongestant meds, and 2 nasal sprays. Agian, back with lots of pills. Speaking of how much meds I've been taken, thank God, I was born in this century when all the miracle chems are made and created in a form of easy tablets--just to be chucked along with water.
Just for fun thoughts:
Case One: if I was born, say, millions years ago, I would have probably died since I was 9 years old due to allergy since no cave man knew what allergy was.
Case Two: Say, if I was born half million years ago, all my meds would have been replaced by some weird looking/ smells-like-crap herbs. I would have ended up dead by the age of 13 due to diarrhea along with severe depression.
I have had several conversations with many friends in the past about this. It is an endless topic to talk about. Who said physical attraction isn't important? Some may say no, but bet they are in denial. Say, you meet someone for the first time, the very first thing you will see is what they look like. Are they light skin? Are their eyes blues? Are they chubby, skinny or average? Are they ugly, pretty or hot? These are what you will see at first....far before these questions: Are they nice? Do they have a good heart? Are they funny? Are they an asshole?
So first impression is everything. Before you get to know the person, their 'face' and 'figure' are what you are gonna see first. 'Personalities' and 'heart' will be the next stop, and will take a while to figure that out. In some cases, it may take you weeks or months to figure someone's personality. When someone asks me how to I feel about so and so, my answer is usually, "I don't know, give me another few weeks."
This is what I just start to admit when I am close to turn 30.
1) Every little expenses can add up if you aren't careful. They will eventually all pile up. Before
you know it, your bank account can be very minimal.
2) Bookkeeping is the key--and you have to be consistant. Do not wait and wait and wait till you
are 3 months late.
3) You really want someone, at least one, you can trust to be in the restaurant at all time.
4) Cost control is everything. Food cost shouldn't exceed 30% of the revenue.
Sadly, the restaurant I work part-time will close down its full-service bar at the end of the year. As alcoholic as it sounds, I've always liked to have liqours and alcohols sold in the restaurant. I feel that this helps raising profits--owner gets to make more money, waitresses get more tips and whatsoever. Anyway, the owner has just sold his liquor license and yes, it makes me pretty disappointed to see it get away. The thing with a Thai restaurant is that: without a bar, the place just simply looks like any other plain Thai place with no ambience. With a bar, there is live music, there are always people hanging out--the plain Thai joint is just too boring, to me.
Monday, November 27, 2006
Pretty amazing feeling goes to Addai and efford from the team. Even if it isn't really a close game, but hey, who I am to complain. We win! That's all it matters right now. This is why I have been converted to a royal fan. The feelings are high and the game is fun to watch. This must be the best home game so far for this season. Now our record is 10-1. Too bad to lose to the Cowboys last week, but oh well.... Next week at the Titans at 1:00pm. (Photo Courtersy by Sam Riche, the Indianapolis Star)
Saturday, November 25, 2006
Today, I've made it an official day, Saturday November 25, 2006, I admit, well sort of, I am kinda picky of what I am about to indulge. I need to know exactly what it is made of, where it is coming from and what it is gonna taste like. I just need to do a history check. No I'm not talking about those damn ducks anymore. I'm talking about food in general.
So many people out there have been mentioned in the past that I am picky as hell. I won't eat this and that when most people eat them. I just don't. Most of them have to do with meat or something that is once alive, can cry or make noise. Don't get me wrong. I enjoy meat. But meat? My exceptable meats have to be fully cooked. I don't care how expensive that piece of fish at a Japanese restaurant is or how great it tastes raw, I don't care. I want them cooked or I won't eat it. Especially with beef, pork, chicken, they are required to be cooked. They can be steaks or whatever fancy dishes in a french restaurant, they all better be cooked or I will not touch them. Aside from that, all meats I eat have to be strictly the meat part only--no liver, kidney whatsoever. Those are just plain gross. I only eat beef, pork, chicken, fish and shrimp. Other animals beside those 5, it is forbidden to me. They are not necessary for my brain or my taste buds. I think my imagination is too high that I will have this pictures going on when I eat something strange. Last time when someone makes a comment on my pickiness was yesterday when I went to work at a Thai restaurant. We were standing in the kitchen to be exact. Conversation goes:
Other: "Hey! come here, have you ate yet?"
Me: "What a good timing! I'm so hungry. What have you got?" (excitingly)
Other: Didn't say nothing, but pointed towards the dish in front of him.
Me: "What the hell is that?"
-----------------------The dish looks like some kinds of Laos' bloody beef salad or something worse than that.
Me: "Er...I don't think I'm hungry anymore. Do you have anything else?"
Other: "Come on, what's wrong with this? It's good."
Me: "I don't wanna talk about it. Do you have something else?"
Other: "Yeah....eat this" (while handing me something grilled.)
Me: "What, grease balls?"
Other: "It's a grilled beef. You dip with fish sauce."
Me: "I know, but where is the beef part? All I can see is fat, fat and more fat."
Other: "It's good this way. You dip in fish sauce and eat with sticky rice. Why, don't you like fat"
Me: "Damn right! Who like fat, huh?"
Other: "Me and definitely the rest of the south east asia." (while looking at me strangely.)
Me: "You probably will die because of heart attack 5 minutes after you take a bite off this
grease ball. Good luck with that!"
Other: "God.....you are so picky. Why don't you get the hell out of here and make your own
Me: "I didn't mean to offend you."
Friday, November 24, 2006
I will make it quick. I'm not a very big Thanksgiving foods fan, but since I would be eating free, didn't have to cook and wasn't obligated to wash dishes, I had no right to complain. During the line up, I was trying to contemplate what I was gonna eat (for those who don't really know, I am only fond with mashed potatoes.) The host insisted that I must eat their Turkey. They said I'd like it since there were two kinds--smoked and regular (what they didn't know was how much I dislike Turkey.) But since I didn't have much to say (and another option was ducks!!! Yuck!!!), I settled with a little piece of Turkey with LOTS of gravy on top of it to delete all the flavour from the big bird itself (what a shame!) Turned out, it was pretty successful. Turkey didn't taste like Turkey at all with all the sea of gravy, mixed with mashed potatoes and stuffing. Everyone was happy. I looked at a person right next to me, oh...there was this season rice going on. Damn! that looked good, so I made my next move. I scooped those rice, and ate them. All I could say was: this crap was one of the nasiest things I've ever had in my life. People around catched my reaction you know. Conversation went like this:
My tought: "What the fuck is this shit?" (with strong facial expression)
Other: "What's wrong?"
Me: " Er....nothing. But what is this?" (while trying to swallow those rice and pointed)
Other: "Rice Pilaf."
Me: " I know, but what kind of spices you put in it?"
Other: " Oh..just pepper and salt."
Me: "Are you sure? I'm sure I taste something else too."
Other: "What? What do you mean?"
Me: "I don't know..that's why I ask you. It definitely doesn't taste like salt and peper."
Me: "It has this smell and grease and....................."
Other: "Oh those rice were stuff in the duck. It's from the duck."
That damn duck! Jesus, that's why. That's why it tasted so disgusting. I hate duck and I just ate something that came straight from inside the damn duck!!!!! Are you all crazy? Man! That explains. You know several years ago, I've sworn not to touch anything 'duck' again in my life. I don't care how good of a chef you are, I just don't wanna mess with it. But yesterday, I was tricked into it and yes, ducks, they never fail to make me wanna puke--not once. Before this time, the last time I had a piece of duck was when I went to a famous chinese restaurant in Bangkok and my mom insisted me to try their famous Paking Ducks (you know, those roast ducks that you basically eat only their crispy skin with some ....well...something. Lots of people love it, but not me.) I've never ran to the bathroom that fast in my life. As you can guess, I puked my ass off and from that moment on, I know how much I hate it. Until yesterday people, until yesterday. This duck-taste stuff kills Turkey. It makes Turkey taste like something from heaven. That bad, you guys. That bad.
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
We will be leaving this late afternoon and pretty much will be hanging out until the big meal tomorrow. The thing about Thanksgiving and turkey is that: I've never like Turkey. Well sort of. Several years back, I was ok with turkey--it tastes just like chicken with lots of white meats. Until one of my friends pointed it out, "yeah...it kinda taste like chicken, but not exactly." Then I started to sense the differences between the two. Turkey gives me the "vibe" of a stronger chicken-smell. I can't explain it. Just like ducks. I've never like duck--not once. In duck's case, no one has pointed it out. Everybody I know love ducks. Some say, "maybe you haven't had a good ducks yet." Oh believe me, I have given ducks so many trails. From the street stalls to home cooks, from high-ended restaurants to those who only specialize in making good ducks, nah....I still hate it. Ducks taste strange as well as turkey. So now my road to Thanksgiving, I heard that someone will make Turkey and ducks, damn me. I will have to start praying for the next available meat--ham...maybe.
If I will ever held my own Thanksgiving dinner, sorry folks, I will probably skip turkey. And that my Thanksgiving will be strange as hell.
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
It is ok if you don't know your action is gonna hurt somebody, and end up hurting one. The problem is: what if you know whatever you are doing is gonna cause somebody in pain sooner or later, but you can't help--you go ahead and do whatever you want anyway solely because as much as you hate hurting people, you also wanna spoil yourself a little more. 'Follow your heart' somebody once said. Hell....I've always done just that and my heart never fails to fuck me over--if not me, somebody else's.
To prevent this to happen, I've always stayed clear to whoever I feel that I someday will hurt them to be aware of the 'situation.' I always tell them that even though my behavior/ action/ interaction don't seem to match what I've said, but please remember what I've said exactly because my words speak louder and clearer than my behavior. I will repeat my motto over and over to make sure they understand where I stand. However, my behavior must be ignored. Pretty weird, huh?
Most people misinterpret me. They feel that I am confused and don't know exactly what I want. I don't think so. Just because my behavior is blurry, doesn't mean I don't know what I am doing and what I am gonna do. I find myself, a lot of time, doing stuff in the totally opposite side of what I've said, but hey....like I've said, 'ignore my behavior.' You do whatever you wanna do, but remember one thing, I've done my part even though it sounds pretty selfish. Sorry. But maybe you don't know the whole me just yet.
Monday, November 20, 2006
1) A Great Family: I have one hell of a great family, start off from my parents, my grandparents (all passed away), my siblings, aunts and uncles. They are great people, love me and support me. I know when I look back, they are always there for me with no doubt.
2) Great Friends: I have a lot of friends and good friends, but very few great friends. When I say they are great, I mean same as family. I've met all of my great friends from grades school to high school, from college to post college. I value quality over quantity.
3) A Great Boyfriend: Dan is awesome! He is not only my BF, but also my best friend, and honestly if you asked me about him 6 years back, I wouldn't have said that, but turn out, he is one fine man. Every time I turn around, I know he's there and I just love that feelings.
4) A Great Ear: You know what I mean. This is not plural. I have only one good ear, which is the right (from the surgery.)
5) Food and Water: I've never struggled.
6) A Place to Live: I've never struggled.
7) A Faith: I believe a man/ a woman without faith is like one without a soul. I'm thankful for the faith I've always had, which keep my going.
9) Many Little Things in Life: People I have met along the way, lessons I learn daily, mistakes I've made, love I have given, love I have received, and friendship.
10) Advanced Medicines: This may sound a little funny, but without those technologies and allergy medication, I really can't imagine what would have happened to me right now.
Sunday, November 19, 2006
"Let's talk about other things" is my way to politelt say that: "okay! I explain myself enough. Either you need to shut up or we will talk about something else because I don't care anymore about what you think."
Lately, I've met this kind of I-only-believe-in-what-I-believe-and-other-who-think-differently-are-wrong people. I can't even explain how sick I am with these humans. So my take has changed. I only go: okay! we have different views...why don't we just talk about other things." The funny part is that, these people will not stop. It's like they are in this religious colt and want to get you converted. Even though you do not wish to continue, they will keep ranting about stupid stuff. It actually reminds me of myself when I was like 13 years old. I was like that too, but as I get older...a little more life lessons later, I've changed. Anyhow, I guess, some people will never change at all..no matter what. This is when different value comes in.
"He who knows does not speak.
He who speaks does not know.
He who knows others is wise.
He who knows himself is enlighten." By Lao-Tzu, The Way of Lao-Tzu
Saturday, November 18, 2006
10:00pm: We saw Dena's ex sitting with his new little girlfriend. I was thinking...what an ass! Why would he bring his new GF to a place of business that basically his ex wife and sons work there. The girl is so young....literally younger than his youngest son. You see this picture. The solely reason the girl is with him is clear---money.
10:30pm: Dena's son walked in. You see this half Caucasian/ American, half Jordanian who is super cute.
11:00pm: We relocated to the Usual Suspect next door since the music at Bleecker Street was getting pretty loud. The next door bar reminded me of those upscale bar in Bangkok. Only that, the bartender is extremely cute. I told Dena, she definitely needed to recruit this Jake guy for her new restuarant.
12midnight-3am: We didn't wanna go anywhere anymore. Since Dena's knows the owner, all drinks were pretty much free. This was probably the first night in a very very long time, I actually drank wine. Even though the place wasn't that fun or anything, it was a great place to hang out since it wasn't very crowded and loud.
3:10am: Okay...I should have expected this coming. My car and Dena's were parked behind Bleecker Street. Before leaving Usual Suspect, Dena whispered me that she wanted to go inside Bleecker again to see her ex. I didn't even doubt....man..should have seen it coming. Once we walked inside, Dena went straight to the young girl who was with her ex. The conversation (if you wanna call it 'conversation' went like this:
Dena: (hugging the girl) Hey do you know who am I?
Girl: (giggle) No..I don't know who the hell you are. (for the record, she knows.)
Dena: You know....B**** You know you are younger than my youngest son? That is sick.
--------conversation went on while I was standing there....so uncomfortable. By the time I knew it, I was calling out for Dena's son (who is a bar manager there) that this may be time for him to stop 'the conversation.' Her ex though dragged Dena back into the kitchen asking what the hell she was doing. We left a little later, but sat in my car with light off staking the situation. Yes..seems that Dena's little mission was completed. The two were fighting and that they didn't know we were watching.
3:40am: I was driving back home, thinking...."gosh...divorce is something you really don't want in your life."
Thursday, November 16, 2006
19. Count down from 5, then hit them and run away.
18. Slap them on the head, then explain you were trying to kill the bee in their bonnet.
17. Continually interrupt with "...and this bothers you?"
16. Answer everything with "yes" until they become infuriated, then say "probably not" when they ask if you want your *** kicked.
15. Respond to every insult and accusation with a smile and say "and proud of it!", then inform them that their anger is a response to jealousy.
14. Shake your head sadly and moan "if only you'd used your temper for good instead of yelling at me."
13. Hold your wrist up and insist that they slap it. When they do, claim you've been justly punished and they have no right to continue persecuting you.
12. Look at them strangely, then after a while look surprised and go "oh, you're talking about me!"
11. Look at them, astonished, then exclaim "I want the drugs you're on!"
10. Hug them, explain that you feel enlightened, and thank them for putting you in your place.
09. "I really would love to stay and listen, but my goldfish must be getting hungry by now."
08. Interrupt them and ask "should I be jotting any of these points down, cos.' I've already forgotten everything so far."
07. Make sound of a phone ringing. Pick up an imaginary phone after a few rings. "Uh huh. yes, yes he is. uh, it's for you, it's someone who cares."
06. Look past them as though there's something there which is distracting you. When they turn around to see what it is, hit them on the head with an esky lid. Pretend it fell from a tree, even if there are no trees around.
05. "I hear what you're saying. I see your point of view. I understand exactly what you mean. I simply don't give a ****."
04. Wait for a pause, then inform them that there's a vein sticking out near their right temple.
03. If asked what you have to say for yourself, look them calmly in the eye and say tentatively "show me the money?"
02. Look around and say loudly, "would somebody get the kettle, please!"
01. Say "Yell all you want, I won't remember."
Note: They are so funny. Got this off a friend.
The sad thing is I will have to remain in contact with her as long as I continue to go this same doctor. Sadly, he is hot and he is the one who operated my ear, so with these two combined, I will have to continue to see him, and yes, that nurse from hell.
When you have an operation, it's nothing like having a cold. There are tons of concerns, questions and follow-ups. Meaning, asides from the doc (who is always busy) I have to talk to the nurse whom I hate. Why do I hate her? Okay, here is the deal. Now...delete all the picture perfect of those kind and friendly and considerate ideal nurse you have in mind. This one is something different. So like I said, having a surgery isn't like having a cold. You will end up with lots of cares, questions and so on. Since I didn't go to med school or anything close to that, I definitely have lots of questions. I will ask. Why? Because it is my damn ear, and if I go deaf, yes, it is me who have to suffer later. Back to the nurse from hell, oh man, she hates answering questions. She is so jumpy and just has no patience like she's supposed to have. Lately, my ear acts all weird with pressure and stuff. I called and realized that I need certain medications. This girl is just too lazy to do all the work. She is not willing to work with my insurance to sort things out, simply because she 'feels' it will take her hours (reality check, this will take her like 5 minutes.) To make a long story short, I hung up the phone from her thinking, maybe it is the time for me to give up the hot doc, for a much better thing. People have told me I should discuss the matter with the doc, but hell, that hot dude doesn't know nothing. He probably is too busy to catch up with the latest news. I will not even bother to try.
Lesson Learned: Not all nurses are nice.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
If you fall into the second one, then stop your thought about being in restaurant business ASAP. That ain't happening. You will be working on weekends and holidays when your friends are off work. You will be working long hours when other are hanging out, relaxing. Yes, you will have those fun times too, but it will fall into 'slow' days..like Monday and Tuesday when nobody wanna hang out cuz they have gotta work. Basically, you will either hang with those who are in the same business or those who are unemployed.
So tonight was a party night for all of those restauranteurs I know. Many of my friends have asked me if I am really serious about being in this industry. My answer right now is yes, pretty much. I've never felt more alive and this happy for years. Maybe I have found another thing in life I enjoy aside from photography. Yah...I guess....for now. Soon I will be a part of this soon-will-open new/hip restaurant and bar in the northside and we will see what happen. I can see this is actually happening and getting more interesting.
Sunday, November 12, 2006
Anyway, when alcohol is in your system, chances are: you will end up doing something pretty...er....what's the word for it?.....interesting! Some turn to be extrovert. Some turn hyperactive. Some get all critical. As of me? I turn to be a retard--and I mean big time. (and I will leave it as that people. Never want to explain it in details.)
But here is my take. So I tried to be a responsible adult since apparently I had gotta drive home. I drank LOTS of water. Did it help? Kind of. But it wouldn't have helped much if you take a sip of water along with a chug of rum. Nah....I wouldn't say that would help. Some people say alcohol is bad. I don't think so as long as you drink responsibly (literally, and I'm not an example for that though.) Discover one good mixture: diet mountain dew, vodka, kool-aid. Shake them well. Drink over ice. This can be done for under $10 and for a party over 10. Cheap stuff.
Saturday, November 11, 2006
Did I mention I went back to the MD to for my ear surgery follow-up? The thing is that, apparently, the incition in my ear is still swollen. Meaning, there are still some pressures in there. Meaning, I will be right back to the surgery room if it's still gonna be swollen in the next two months. Meaning, if I don't take it easy, I will send myself right back into the same spot I was almost 2 months ago. Meaning, I will be depressed again! Definitely, not looking forward to that. MD gives me another option, once the 2 months period is up, I will go back to see him again. If it's not getting any better, I will be ordered to be on the bed rest. "BED REST" em...sounds very comfy and all, but do you know the concept of bed rest? Think a pregnant woman with a complication. An obgyn will make that gal to stay in bed only and that's all. In my case, I will be in bed for a week. Thinking about being in bed for a week and only get off bed to the bathroom and eat only. No it doesn't sound very inviting to me. So at this moment, I will need to change to avoid that. Bed rest is almost the last thing I want. But getting back to the surgery thing is definitely the last thing I want.
This is definitely hard for me to do less of my routine. Look, I am not the most hard-working/ the most active person in the world, but hell, this is definitely hard. Not sure what to do yet. emmmmmmmm
Thursday, November 09, 2006
Lots of people I know have asked me in the past few weeks if I still work in a restaurant. The answer is yes, I still do (along with my daytime work,) and bet I am getting good at it. I actually wait tables for the first time in my life last Saturday due to employee shortage. It wasn't bad. As you all know, waitresses make a living off tips. So my take here is that: waiting table is like a customer services/ sales job. If you are nice, but no nothing about what you are selling, that won't take you very far. Even though some customers feel that they are 'kinda' obligated to pay at least 15% tips, but hell, they can do better than that. I arrive at the restaurant at 6pm and work till 9:30pm, which is great--I wanna be there during their busiest hours anyway. There are 4 waitresses total and they normally do 'pool tips' when they put all their tips together and later on equally splitted. Since I was new, nobody wanna do so-called 'pool' tips out of the sudden. They expected me to suck so bad (which really, that was what I expected as well at the time.) So they agreed to own their own table and received tips only off their tables. Well that was fine to me. I also agreed to wait not-so-many table that night since I didnt really know what I was doing yet. I didnt wanna overwhelm myself...basically.
Turning out, I wait probably third less than other three that work there. But that gave me a BIG chance to care for customers I have. Since I have enough time to run around and socialize, I could serve them better. I got to spend quality time explaining/ suggesting/ asking those customer, which leaded to bigger tips. The funny thing is that: most of my customer wanted to open bottles if wine, which boosted the sale. They were so loyal and so easy to be convinced. I remember counting my tab later on and I am sure making so much money than those who waited so many more tables than me. I am not doing this for money at all, but after seeing how much I can pull during those three hours, hell, I am here for money,hahaha. Today, I stopped by the restaurant for food. I saw the same waitresses and they asked me if I'd work this weekend. I said maybe. Now they want the split tips. Do you remember what I've said earlier? Yah...these are the same people who DIDN'T wanna split tips with me. The same exact one.
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
Since there is only 24-hour period, lately, I have slept less, play less and on top of that, still trying to jungle a million thing all at once. Good side: I am still pretty happy. Bad side: I only get to do a little at a time. I get to go a little of everything and at the end of the day, I often ponder, "heck! I have done a lot today, but none of them is completed!" The problem I see is that: it still keeps me going, preventing me from getting bored. I see that as a problem because then I feel that I haven't really done my best...why? because I have no time! Damn it!
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
1) I am an EXTREMELY indecisive person, and I mean...very very indecisive. I find myself, several times, that I know what I want, but not exactly sure. It takes me a while to go on with 'pros' and 'cons' and almost always end up doing to 'cons' things.
2) I am a good liar (well yeah, I categorize this as a 'bad' thing.) Really, I am really good. I can have things planned out and make a movie of it. I've realized this quality of me since a few years back while ponder..."damn...I'm good." Sometimes I feel bad for it, but most of the time, I am okay with my lying decision. Gosh...this is bad.
3) I am a plan B person. Usually, my plan A is almost always better, but B sounds much better so I randomly skip the better A plan and go with B. More likely, it ends up as a dumb decision.
4) I mostly follow my heart not head. Now this can be a good thing, but hey...some times your head is just smarter. I often let my evil side of me take a hold of everything. I feel good, but never fails to kick my ass real hard later.
5) I over think..way tooooo much! I think this quality is a result from number 1, 2 and 3. Even picking up a bite from McDonald's. Before I make a trip, I have already thought about what kinda meal I want and what it will taste like. This shit will make me crazy someday.
6) I can be very judgemental. But I have a good side on this stuff. I never let my judgement out in public. I will think think and think (see number 5.)
Okay..this is all for now. I will continue later (since this can go on forever.) The more I make the list, the more it will come out and everybody will hate me for it. Need to stop before I start having this self-pity.
Sunday, November 05, 2006
Now I start to worry about my life during emergency time. I guess once some craps happen, I probably end up doing some stupid thing. No priority involved. What was I thinking?
This laptop is pretty much dead right now, but works from time to time depending on its moods. Today, my laptop is in a great mood so it works. Tomorrow, you just never know.
PS: for those of y'all who have given me emails to hear about my self-control crisis. Okay...Let me sleep through it tonight and will email y'all tomorrow.
Thursday, November 02, 2006
I'm not a kinda girl someone would normally categorize as a hot material. Cute maybe. So today has been my best day for this average looking female. But hell....why did I come back with a below-average-IQ person's response? This will haunt me forever. Oh and the guy goes: "seriously, you are really pretty." Okay now my self-esteem is higher than ever. I think I will enter myself into a model search tomorrow.
Note: same goes to when someone says to you: I love you, and you go: "oh! thank you." What the hell?