Self Relaxation Techniques

Spoke with a friend today about classic self relaxation techniques such as taking a deep breath--I don't think it works!

The thing is, I recognize my problem as far as anger control. I even think I have been going on for years without a diagnosis of bipolar disorder or maybe I just simply need to find a practical yet effective anger management class. Ok, back to self relaxation technique like taking a deep breath. A friend said that it helps you psychologically by concentrating on inhaling and exhaling--keep doing so repeatedly until you are eventually........relax *sign.* In addition to that she said, after breathing in and out, you will need to acknowledge your anger, frustration, agitation and whatever and however you are feeling, then tell yourself to stop thinking about that, moving on and developing positive thoughts. And that's supposed to help. She said it actually helps.

Earlier on today, some idiots at work took me off big time. Man, am I mad? Yes. I tried the above recommendations, but it lasted about 2 sets of in/exhales then BOOM, I got corrupted by bad thoughts. I didn't happen. I think I went off on someone (FYI: and don't really feel bad about it.) So far, taking deep breaths don't really help me as much, but going off on someone helps. Yelling is great and cursing is also a plus. Jeez, you know, after yelling for about 2 minutes, man...I actually did fell so damn great!

Me and Me

Lately, I've been feeling like most people who know me around here don't really know the whole me. And those who I believe, know as of knowing me back home, they don't really know the whole me. Confusing, isn't it.

Friends in Indy, of course, know me as of me in Indy version. I'm from Thailand and know me as of me living in the States. Me who gets grocery done at Meijer (occasionally Marsh,) washes my car semi-annually, goes to work on weekdays and at times on weekends, and me as of an Asian girl.

Now, friends in Bangkok, as well, know me as of me in BKK version. Me who used to live in Chiang Mai, grew up in Bangkok and have parents living in Bangkok as well. They basically know, as of really know me in between 5 years of age through about 20 years old. Now, anything in between 20 through 30.....not so sure.

So I get to sit down and think today, besides my parents, who out there really know me since day one through, well, right now. It sucks though when I really think about it. It's not like I really really care, but hell, it'd be nice if you know what I mean. Recently, I get to speak with one of a very very good childhood friends from elementary school whom I had not seen since....well, anytime over 15 years. It was a big surprise--a good surprise. Lots of things to catch up because her, as I last seen over 15 years ago, I didn't even remember what she looks like anymore (for a present look.) When she emails me the picture I then realize, damn! I am really missing something. Body count continues. Who else should I get in touch with????

Life outside Indianapolis

I like today.

First of all, I've talked to one of my childhood best friends I had not spoken/ seen for over 15 years. It happens that her sister works at the same place as a family friend who happens to know my sister. So here, she has my email address. I emailed her back. She called me just minutes ago. I am thrilled. I am very excited. The funny thing is: she studies at Ann Arbor, Michigan, which basically only four hours away from me.

Second cool story of today is: I finally bought the plane ticket to Thailand in August. My date of leaving, visiting home and catching up seems to be real now. This is great. I didn't realize how excited I was until the minute I submitted my credit card numbers. I am over the roof. I am all about it. I'm going to Thailand in a couple of months!!!